Kindergartenism #44:
Kelsey: "I was born without patience."
Me: "No patience?"
Kelsey: "Nope...I just can't handle it."

Kindergartenism #45:
In a reading group, I was discussing r-controlled words (words with -ar) with the students.
Me: "Can anyone think of another -ar word?"
Grant: "Bernard"
Me: "Oh yeah, the boy's name."
Josh: "Bernard? Like the store?"
Me: "Store? I don't know a store named Bernard."
Josh: "You know...(sings) Save big money at Bernards"